Newspaper Headlines That Make You Want to Give Up on Life

Simpsons/Family Guy crossover episode

Pretty much gave up on this show years ago, but this still feels disgusting.

what

Ned, don't do that to undo on a week like this.

Fucking tech geeks, man.

Yeah, I'd hate to spend the better part of an evening eating good food in the company of a pretty girl. Hope that guy gets the fate he deserves (and maybe even wants), jacking off to porn on a tablet in a hip loft.

finding a shirt that fits properly takes "too much time"

Look at all the body language in that photo.

She's reaching for her purse to make a getaway, right?

Adam Diamond could also have gone in my 'New worst dude' thread.

undo wrote:

I may not like that guy, but I'm definitely cool with his choice of career



Unless, of course, his trailers aren't all like that one, in which case fuck him.

Adam Diamond seems fine enough. you guys are reading a lot into "Going out to dinner for a first date 'takes too much time'".

lots of people date on OKC, Tinder, PlentyofFish or whatever stupid app is up to bat next. this dude is meeting women in their late 20s at a bar multiple times a month, according to this photo and caption. that's not really the loneliest thing he could be doing.

i guess it's part of the weenie nature of this tech dating scene that people use this as a convenient way to bail on a date early. this guy might be that kind of weenie. if you meet at the bar before doing something else, you can just decide you're not into the date and take off. once you're at a restaurant you're somewhat stuck.

this AD classic from the USAToday website has me lollin though

AD wrote:"If you're sitting down for a dinner date, that's putting way too much time out there for a first date. You don't know how it's going to go," says Adam Diamond, 29, a movie trailer editor in Los Angeles.

If I'm being really honest with myself I guess I'd prefer drinking a beer alone and boarding on my phone over buying dinner for some lady I don't like very much.

people are really just trying to break down the formality and "expectations" going into a date. just an obsession with, as the article points out, multi-tasking and trying to maximize your time in social experiences. it doesn't end up actually maximizing anything, it's just a technocratic way of looking at human interaction, which is why there are trend pieces about how society is falling apart and texting is destroying marriage.

we're protecting ourselves from rejection by forming social norms that allow us to be pussies and say "i don't want to finish this date because we have nothing in common, so i'm going to watch House of Cards on my phone".

If I ever buy glasses to look cool and sophisticated, I've really gotta remember to keep my phone in my pocket.

Dorky lookin' combo is all I'm sayin!

f u ned bra den

Yeah, but its awesome when you do it Jasper. If I had a sister I'd be cool with her dating you, but not that famous Love 2.0 guy.

i can't pull off the flashy button up look AD is going for, i'm not slender enough.

also his beer isn't dark enough.

jasperness wrote:Adam Diamond seems fine enough. you guys are reading a lot into "Going out to dinner for a first date 'takes too much time'".

What are we reading into it? Taken at face value, it paints the guy as someone too immature, ADHD, or busy tweeting and playing candy crush to actually be social with a female human for a couple uninterrupted hours. If that's "fine enough" for you or his potential mates, I guess everything old farts say about the smartphone generation is true.

Any 29 year old savvy enough to have dinner with a woman, make eye contact & talk to her, without once pulling out his phone, probably gets more action than he can handle these days. And to Raj's point, a fitted shirt wouldn't hurt the cause either.

undo wrote:

L-R: boy, woman

When I am out to dinner and I see dudes playing on their fucking smart phone in the company of a female I really think they should have their dick cut off and be forced to try and Tweet with it.

I definitely wouldn't be comfortable w/ Chrono dating my sister, given all we know of his perversions.

Soma wrote:given all we know of his perversions.

interesting perspective

i think my persona is much more "neurotic nice guy you might actually want your kin to date" a la Braden's perspective than "twisted sister pervert" just because i'm an Internet voyeur who has fetishes for ethnic women